21 years of being alive, almost.

So i turn 21 tomorrow. How does that feel? It feels okay i guess. Its funny, i remember being at school, when i was about 13, talking to my best friend Liam, making pacts that if we both weren't in relationships by now we would get together. Luckily I'm in a relationship and he's gay now. That would have been awkward. This last year feels like it has flown past. I'd like to say its because time flies when you re having fun. Sadly not though, as you may have seen in a previous post i lost my mum just before my 20th birthday. Since then the days have been blending into months and before i knew it I'm a year older. The surrealness of the situation has left me wondering where the time went, but thankful that I'm feeling better. It has been a year of growing up, hugely. The sad comes with the happy. I may have lost my mother but i have found a new sense of purpose and gratitude for those in my life. One thing that has really given me something to look forward to is that my friend Rachel fell pregnant around, well, 9 months ago actually. She is about to pop and i couldn't be more excited. I know it sounds stupid and I'm really not a spiritual person, but it feels like my mums life wasn't lost in vein. Someone else is coming, which is quite comforting. My holiday to Italy really helped me feel at peace also. I felt totally free and without worries. I didn't have to care what time it was or think about work. All i had to do was adventure the astoundingly beautiful city of Venice and enjoy every second of it. I didn't care about sticking to my diet, saving my money or keeping to the beaten track. I got lost and always found my way back. The warm city felt safe. The bridges and winding alleys felt like a home i had never been to before. That trip has really ignited a wanderlust in me. This year i have progressed so much in my illustrating and I'm so grateful for all the work i have got. I have had so many great opportunities and exciting offers. Where i would have been stuck in complacency and not been bothered before, I'm grabbing onto each opportunity now and seeing where it takes me. 21 is going to be good, its going to be a year that sees me create amazing things and grow as an artist. It will be a fun and i cant wait to share it with you all. Now here is a picture of me looking deep and contemplative. 

Birthday Wishlist.

 So my 21st is coming up. Ive made a little birthday wishlist. Im aware this is an incredibly dorky collection of items. But hey ho. Thats me. 

 

This little foxy bag, because i like anything thats shaped like an animal. 

How cute is this Totoro Ipad case? i dont actually have an iPad but y'know, a girl can hope.

Because why WOULDN'T you want your iPhone to look like BMO?!

Im a geek. I just love Totoro.

Again, im a loser, i know. I cant help but like it.

This one isn't really for me. My best friend is about to pop a little bun out of the oven. And i WILL dress her like R2D2. Weather she likes it or not. 

portrait spotlight: Bodacious Thought.

Morning everyone, I'm sharing another portrait commission today. This is the lovely Dorien from Bodacious Thought. This one was so much fun, she has such an awesome look and her kitty is so cool. This one made me notice how quickly my style is developing with all the practise! Anyway here it is.

 If anyone is interested in a portrait, please drop me an email at bouxwho@gmail.com 

i love doing them!

24/08/2011

This is probably going to be a really tough post for me to write, i will probably have to cut it short as I'm likely to get pretty emotional. Exactly a year ago today, i woke up to my sister knocking at my bedroom door, i opened it to find her crying. She just said that she didn't know how to tell me something. The worst that i thought could have happened was maybe something bad happened to one of the cats. I did not expect her to tell me that a couple of hours before, my mum had been run over by a car and died. We went downstairs and there was a policeman and woman in my living room. They then proceeded to tell us what happened. They called my dad and asked him to come home from work. When he arrived they broke the news to him. Seeing your dad cry is a horrible thing. After a lot of talking and tea we went to my nans house to tell her, which was probably the hardest part, my nan has lost 3 of her 4 children. I don't know how she carries on. The whole day was a blur. My sisters boyfriend, who was then living and working in France, got on the first flight home. I don't think my sister would have managed without him. The support of our friends and family was unbelievable. The turn out to her funeral was incredible, i had no idea my mum was loved and known by so many people. There was an article about her in the local paper and we received so many cards and flowers. My mum was so much fun, she was the life and soul of every party we had. Her wake was amazing, she would have loved it. Everyone she loved, together. Not standing around in black, moping. Everyone wore yellow and we drank and danced and remembered the good times. 

I have realised how much my mother did for me. Since then, i have changed. I have grown up and stopped being so lazy, I'll never let myself take someone for granted like that again. I had never lost someone close to me before. Its crazy how your life can be turned upside down in an instant. Life is very different now. I have accepted what happened, but I'll never stop missing her. I'm going to leave it at that. I love you mum, i'll see you again one day.

my new tattoo!

So here it is guys! My new baby, i am ab-so-fucking-lutly in love with it! It took about 3 hours, pretty painful but I'm a tough little cookie. The artist was incredible, anyone in the Kent, England area looking for an amazing tattoo, go to Toby at Riverside Tattoo in Gravesend! Such a down to earth guy. We had a great laugh, best tattooing experience i have ever had and i am so happy with it. Its still a bit tender so excuse my puffy arm in these pictures. What do you think!? 

Tuesday is TATTOODAY

I feel like a kid on Christmas eve right now. Tomorrow I'm getting a tattoo, I've already got 3 dinky ickle ones. but this will be my first big boy. Im so excited. I went into the shop on a whim Sunday night to ask about availability, then had a chat with the artist and decided to book it. He was so nice and enthusiastic about my design, it made me feel really good and confident that he is going to do his best. EEEEK. Here is an incredibly rough version of my design. 

What do we think? I'M SO EXCITED.

An English Summer Evening

The weather has been beautiful these past few days. I have had such a lovely holiday. Sadly, i go back to work tomorrow. This time off has really shown me how much i want to travel and how important it is to spend my free time doing the things i love with the people i love. I'm one of these people that really isn't meant for the real world (lazy fucker), I couldn't get a desk job and a mortgage. I am impulsive and i get bored easily. I need to use the talents i have to enable me to live a life where i get paid to do my hobby and doesn't tie me down. Since starting this blog I'm feeling more confident in my ability and way more motivated to work. I'm illustrating every day and I'm getting better all the time. One day i'll be in a position where i can quit my job and work for myself. That will be the best bloody day of my life. I don't want to go back to work, huff. Anyway, here's some pictures i took out in the garden today.